Bod.y Sham.ing, noun: the action or practice of humiliating someone by making mocking or critical comments about their body shape or size. Teasing someone because they don’t fit into standard sizes set by mainstream media is body shaming. Using one’s body shape to determine their beauty or value is body shaming. The term is not gender specific.
Now that we know what body shaming is, let’s talk about what it is NOT. Body shaming is not establishing standards for modesty and discretion. I understand there’s a cultural push for women to embrace their sexuality and value themselves apart from social norms. This trend is actually not as “new” as we think. The women’s movement of the 1960s began the sexual revolution and it has continued to gain momentum since, perhaps just in different forms. What is new, or at least gaining more popularity, is this notion that in order to embrace one’s womanhood you have to also be comfortable with sharing your body with the world.
Just recently, a federal court in Colorado ruled that laws prohibiting women from showing their breasts in public is discrimination. The Court found there is no difference between a man or a woman’s breast, so to differentiate between the two through laws is constitutionally prohibited.[1] The Court ruled that it’s perfectly okay for women to walk around with their breasts out. Now, I’m all for women empowerment. As an entrepreneur, I encourage women to pursue their goals and ignore limitations set by others. But like seriously, why would you want to walk around with your boobs out? And if I look at you crazy for walking around topless, or say, “I don’t want to see your tits,” I’m body shaming you? I don’t think so!
“… the term ‘body shaming’ has become code for ‘no standards.’ ”
Sure, everyone has their own opinion and can arguably do what they want to do. But the term “body shaming” has become code for “no standards.” In a culture where not much is left for the imagination, many are afraid to speak up and encourage women to dress with class and modesty for fear that they will be labeled a woman hater. What are we teaching our daughters, sisters and nieces? If we don’t teach them to value their bodies how will they be able to establish standards by which they require others to respect them once they’re older?
Society has it all wrong. Being naked in public does not equal empowerment or self-love. Yes, everyone should be comfortable with their body and embrace who they are, flaws and all. There’s nothing wrong with dancing naked in your mirror at home if that’s what you choose to do. But you will never convince me that you love yourself more because you post naked pictures on facebook or instagram. And those who advocate for discretion and modestly are not hating or body shaming you.
Let’s get back to setting standards that we want our daughters to live by. Let’s show them that because their bodies are wonderfully and beautifully made, they are to be treasured. When we build confident young girls it will be more difficult for them to fall victim to teasing or be shamed because of their bodies.
[1] https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/02/22/judge-women-can-go-topless/98280372/?hootPostID=2afaabf45ee54bd843c4b5d67129b050